Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Food: Friend AND Foe

No wonder I'm so fat. Food has become my best friend. Something that I can always count on to be there when I need it. It always tastes good and makes me feel better. I can't really say that about any of my people friends.

The relationship between Johnny and I is in shambles. He is depressed and I am making it worse. I'm depressed because I can't seem to do anything right. What makes him happy and what makes me happy are not the same things. I feel like I could burst out in tears at any second. Why do I always mess things up? I let the good guys get away because I don't have feelings for them and then I sabotage the relationships with the guys that I really love. I'm a freak. I have to be so in control of everything that I drive people away. That's probably why I don't have any real friends.

I feel like giving up on everything. I want someone to take care of me.

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